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He may have been a strong brand image. He knocked Scott tissues out of the number one spot. But it all comes down to this: If I had created Mr. Hey, wait, come back! It would work, but would you? Of course, advertising must sell. Offensive, dull, abrasive, stupid advertising is bad for the entire industry and bad for business as a whole.

It is why the public perception of advertising is going down in this country.


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Whipple when he made that comment in the early s. Apply directly to forehead!


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And every year, advertising practitioners trade last or second-to-last place with used car salesmen and members of Congress. It reminds me of a paragraph I plucked from our office bulletin board, one of those e-mailed curiosities that makes its way around corporate America: Dear Ann: I have a problem. I have two brothers. One brother is in advertising. The other was put to death in the electric chair for first- degree murder.

My mother died from insanity when I was three. My two sisters are prostitutes and my father sells crack to handicapped elementary school students. Recently, I met a girl who was just released from a reformatory where she served time for killing her puppy with a ball-peen hammer, and I want to marry her. And when he set out to prove it, something wonderful happened. Bernbach in a minute. Before he showed up, a lot had already happened. Anything that advertising said, people heard. In Which Ad Pulled Best? To sell some- thing, you could go on The Ed Sullivan Show and count on every- body seeing your message.

Soon there were more than one big brand of aspirin, more than two soft drinks, more than three brands of cars to choose from. And adver- tising agencies had more work to do than just get film in the can and cab it over to Rockefeller Center before Milton Berle went on live.

They had to convince the audience their product was the best in its category. And modern advertising as we know it was born.

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On its heels came the concept of the unique selling proposition, a term coined by writer Rosser Reeves in the s, and one that still has some merit. It was a simple, if ham-handed, notion. But then came The Clutter. Then, in response to The Clutter, came The Wall. The Wall was the perceptual filter that consumers put up to protect themselves from this tsunami of product information. Many products were at parity.

Try as agencies might to find some unique angle, in the end, most soap was soap, most beer was beer. Enter the Creative Revolution. And when his agency landed a couple of highly visible national accounts like Volkswagen and Alka-Seltzer, he brought advertising into a new era. The national TV audience was eating it up. The chrome strip on the glove compartment is blemished and must be replaced.

Then came the s. The tightening economy had middle managers every- where scared. And the party ended as quickly as it had begun. The new gods wore suits and came bearing calculators.

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Chop, chop. New ads were pre-tested in focus groups, and subsequent audience-penetration and consumer- awareness quotients were numbingly monitored. It seemed that with enough repetition, even the most strident ad campaigns could bore through to the public consciousness. Advertising turned shrill. People hated Mr. Whipple, but bought Charmin anyway. The industry returned to the blar- ing jingles and crass gimmickry of decades previous.

The wolf was at the door again. Wearing a suit. It was as if all the agencies were run by purse-lipped nuns from some Catholic school. Creativity was gleefully declared dead, at least by the big fat agen- cies that had never been able to come up with an original thought in the first place. And in came the next new thing—positioning.

You look at the market place. You see what vacancy there is. You build your campaign to position your product in that vacancy. Not surprisingly, advertisers fairly tipped over the positioning bandwagon climbing on. But a funny thing happened. Someone could have a marvelous idea for positioning a product, but if the commercials sucked, sales records were rarely broken. Good advertising, it has been said, builds sales. But great adver- tising builds factories.

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The battle between these opposing forces of hot creativity and cold research rages to this hour. It makes for an interesting day at the office.

I cannot imagine any human relationship more perfectly designed to produce total mayhem. When I was in seventh grade, I noticed something about the ads for cereal on TV. There were flocks of leprechauns or birds or bees flying around the bowl, dusting sparkles of sugar over the cereal or ladling on gooey rivers of chocolate-flavored coating. It was all about sugar.

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One morning in study hall, I drew this little progression Figure 1. I liked to draw, to make comic books, and to doodle with words and pictures. But when I was a poor college student, all I was sure of was that I wanted to be rich. I went into the premed program. I majored in psychology. I joined a con- struction crew.

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But the opportunity to sit at a desk and use words to make a living was enough. Of all my duties, I found that selling ads and drawing them up were the most interesting. I did paste-up for another small newsweekly and then put in a long and dreary stint as a typesetter in the ad department of a large department store.

Walking away you think, nice enough fella. And the way he said things: so funny. Through a contact, I managed to get a foot in the door at Bozell. Tom later told me it was my enthusiasm that convinced him to take a chance on me. That and my promise to put in hour weeks writing the brochures and other scraps that fell off his plate. Tom hired me as a copywriter in January of He told me to read them. Get yourself a three-foot stack of your own and read, learn, memorize. Yes, this is a business where we try to break rules, but as T. In fact, it stunk.

Just look at Figure 1. I know. Bob is arguably one of the best art directors in the history of advertising. But his first ad? On the subject of mentors, Helmut Krone said: I asked one of our young writers recently, which was more important: Doing your own thing or making the ad as good as it can be? For all the wincing his commercials caused, they worked. And these people can prove it; they have charts and everything. However much we would like advertising to be a science—because life would be simpler that way—the fact is that it is not.

It is a subtle, ever-changing art, defying formularization, flowering on freshness and withering on imitation; what was effective one day, for that very reason, will not be effective the next, because it has lost the maxi- mum impact of originality.